Friday, 18 January 2013

Public shower etiquette

OK, last night I played my weekly game of 5 a- side football in Halifax. This week however, we were relocated from The Shay to Northbridge Leisure Centre due to pitch resurfacing. This meant we had to get changed and washed in much busier changing rooms. When we play down the Shay it's just a few of us in the showers afterwards, but at the leisure centre there's loads of strangers there as well and it's just wall to wall unwanted nakedness.

I find the experience of being naked in front of other blokes horrible. I'm not ashamed of my body in any way, but I just don't want strange blokes looking at my privates. And you can see some do! Why? I don't want to look at yours, why do you want to look at mine?

And they just wander around the changing rooms with their dong out, so care free, flaunting it around. As soon as I'm out of the shower I'm getting into my boxers as soon as is humanly possible. Yet a lot of other blokes are determined to do the opposite. I don't know how many readers have seen Michael McIntyre's 'Hello Wembley' tour DVD where he does a skit about this very thing, but I agree with everything he says about it. Some blokes will just keep their willies out for as long as possible, they're not afraid to come up and talk to you with it out, they'll happily face you in the showers and wash it.

It's awkward, unpleasant to look at and very discomforting. As soon as I'm naked I get my towel wrapped around me straight away. No messing, even if it's the wrong towel and I've accidentally grabbed someone else's! Yet others just leave their towel out of the way and strut around with it all hanging out.

Last night I wrapped my towel around my waist as I approached the showers and noticed there weren't hooks to hang them on like there are at the Shay changing rooms so had to walk back to my changing space and put my towel down and walk completely naked to the showers, a 10 feet walk away that felt like a 100 feet. It actually felt like walking the plank. I felt like there were 15 sets of eyes staring at me as I awkwardly meandered towards the showers.

I then showered and halfway through my wash some old bloke came and started using the shower opposite me, which was about 1 yard away from me. So there I was minding my own business washing myself and then turned around to see a saggy old bare arse. Not what I wanted to see.

Oh, it's disgusting. I am not a fan of men's changing rooms etiquette at all! What do you think? Are you an advocate of showing your privates off in the changing rooms, because I'm not.

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